tricks

to feel the absence
of hands i never knew,
will never know,
is fate's cruelest trick.

Some words, if left unspoken, will repeatedly carve themselves in you until you preach them.

Keep It Together

Safety pins are
only safe
if you remember
to keep them pinned,
and paper clips
don’t hold as tight
as staples, stuck
through papers’
tattered edges,
and glue sticks
can’t fix
broken hearts
or shattered windows,
just like 
duct tape
won’t save
a leaky pipe 
or make you
forget
last night.

I grab at everything, I end up with nothing, and then I feel bereft.
I mourn over the loss of something I never even had.
I am a sick, sick girl.

cycles

This is the same war
I fought before.
      Different man,
      Different lips,
Same deception.

ambiguity

confused uncertain insecure self-aware worried paranoid frustrated stressed etc etc

all bad things

Cozy

Eyes fail under the sun,
they've adjusted to the night,
and I'm eating at the darkness
because I hate my own light.
I'm wearing myself down
though my spirit wants to roam;
these walls I built around myself
were never meant to be a home.

Sight is another spectrum
that I don't understand,
the wrong sensory input..
like tasting with my hands.
And this prison that was safe
is where I'm most alone
and the walls I've built around myself
is the place I call home.