Things Heard, Then Witnessed, and Now:

when I think of you,
I picture your face and want
to hurl my phone
out the window
with Herculean biceps
until it hits you square
in your mouth
and you are forced
to wander the streets
for the rest of your life
looking for your
two (perfect) front teeth
because Santa won’t
bring them to you
because you’re a fucking
douchebag prick-ass jerk.


hey thanks for helping me come to my senses.